What's Your Shave Number?

By David E Romm

Minicon 40, March 25, 2005
Guest of Honor parts read by the GoHs on their introduction.

Announcer (Dave Romm): The new Shtick Hexadecimal Razor has four individually retractable blades, allowing you to choose the comfort level of your shave. We asked people...

Announcer: What's your Shave Number?

Wife (Nancy McClure): My husband and I can finally use the same razor, saving us needed baggage space in tight overhead compartments. My Shave Number is 3: Two convenient blades up front.
Husband (Martin McClure): And my shave number is C, the two blades on the backside for that close shave.
Wife: One loving blade, so romantic.
Husband: Um, yeah.

Announcer: The new Shtick Hexadecimal Razor for comfort and convenience.


Announcer: What's your Shave Number?

Burly man (Brian Westley): My beard is too thick for only one blade, and so thick that wimpy double blades are too close together. My Shave Number is 5 on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and A on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays. On Sundays... I don't shave.

Announcer: The new Shtick Hexadecimal Razor for comfort and convenience.


Announcer: What's your Shave Number?

Terry Pratchett: I'm Terry Pratchett, and when I'm writing a Discworld novel, merely believing I have shaved is more important than actually shaving. In the throes of creation, my Shave Number is... Zero.

Announcer: The new Shtick Hexadecimal Razor for comfort and convenience.


Announcer: What's your Shave Number?

Jim Young: I'm Jim Young, and when I travel back to my hometown, sometimes I need three blades but I often use only two. My Shave Numbers in Minneapolis: 7 and 3.

Announcer: The new Shtick Hexadecimal Razor for comfort and convenience.


Announcer: What's your Shave Number?

Fastner: I'm Steve Fastner. As an illustrator, I find that the traditional one blade will work nicely. My Shave Number is 1.
Larson: Well, I'm Rich Larson and my Shave Number is 2!
Fastner: 4!
Larson: 8!
Fastner: Hmm... No wonder we're such good partners.
Larson: Yeah, but stop leaving the green fur in the razor, okay?

Announcer: The new Shtick Hexadecimal Razor for comfort and convenience.


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